Tips for Brides 3 - Traditions

There are so many times that people tell me their wedding is different from everyone elses, and then you find that actually it's much the same, largely because of their own, or their mother's, desire for tradition to be followed.  So let's look at some of those traditions.

Did you know that white wedding dresses only became fashionable with Queen Victoria?  Before then brides would wear brightly coloured dresses to celebrate their joy at getting married.  When Queen Victoria wore a white dress, it was linked to what the christian church had taken on as a symbol of purity.  Poorer women would simply wear their best dress, whatever colour it was.  So go on, be brave, and add colour back into weddings, move on from the Victorian imposed 'traditions'!

Veils were originally used in the days when marriages were arranged for the joining of two families (often associated with land).  Quite often a painting (maybe a miniature) would be sent to the groom to show him what his bride would look like, but the painting would not necessarily be an accurate record of her looks (Oliver Cromwell is famously painted as he really looked because he insisted on being painted 'warts and all' at a time when paintings glorified people).  When the bride walked down the aisle she wore the veil to hide her real looks, and it wasn't until they were married that the groom would see exactly who he had married.

The saying 'something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue' comes from Victorian times (those Victorians have a lot to answer for!).  The 'something old' signified the move from the old life for the bride, and the 'something new' relates to the new life that is about to begin.  Having 'something borrowed' is about borrowing something from a happily married woman to encourage some of the same happiness to rub of onto the bride's marriage.  And the 'something blue' is representative of fidelity, as blue represents purity.  The lesser known part of the same at the end is '... and a sixpence in her shoe.' and signifies wishing the bride financial wealth - it's said it should be in the left shoe, by the way. 

Throwing confetti originates from the throwing of rice, and rice is seen as being life giving, and so symbolises the bestowing of fertility on the couple.

The groom wearing a button hole flower comes from the days when he would wear his lady's colours to demonstrate his love for her.

The bride stands on the left of the groom at the altar to allow the groom to keep his sword hand free.

S you're not going to see the groom the night before the wedding?  Well that also links back to arranged marriages where the bride and groom couldn't see each other in case they realised they were not marrying who they thought they were.

I love traditions, but I also feel that you should do what you want for your wedding, which might be to follow tradition, and also could be about you setting tradition aside and doing your own thing, being truly different.

10 Tips for Brides - Getting the Most out of your Wedding Photographs: Part 2

So, as a follow up to the 10 Tips for Brides, I have a few more tips to add which I hope you find helpful.

1. Do your research - buy magazines and tear out photographs you like - with a good photographer you can discuss with them what it is about these tear sheets that you like, and they will be able to help you achieve the look you like.
2. When it comes to your wedding day, think about where you are going to get ready - a tiny room will have very little space for the photographer, your mum, your bridesmaids, the dress, all the essential extras  and, oh yes, you to actually get into.  You may end up needing to move furniture out, or use the living room to get changed if you are wanting photographs to be taken as you get ready.
3. When it comes to getting your makeup done, it is likely that your makeup artist will suggest that you are the last to be done as the bride - no-o-o-o-o-o!  Have your hair and makeup done first - if there are any delays then let them affect a bridesmaid who is not too worried, or who can do her own makeup if necessary.  Allow yourself time to relax - and allow yourself time to have photographs taken.  You will be surprised at how many brides are late getting ready because the makeup artist took longer than they anticipated.
4. Show your photographer the little detail things - even if you like candid photographs, if you are giving your bridesmaids or groomsmen a present, let the photographer know so that they can take the photograph of the gift giving.
5. Before you put your dress on go to the toilet!  It may be a bit more difficult once you are in your dress.
6. If you have gorgeous shoes you may not want to walk across the grass in them to get that perfect photograph.  Rather than spoiling the photo opportunity, take some nice flip flops along with  - the photographer may be able to put them in their car for you.  That way you can take your beautiful shoes off for the time you are walking across the grass.
7. And what if it's been raining?  Buy some great wellies and leave them at the venue so that you can walk across damp grass - the wellies can look great in the photographs too!
8. Check with your photographer to see if they have umbrellas for the inevitable shower we get in the UK summer!  Most will have more than one to keep you dry.
9. Accept now that weather in the UK is temperamental and don't let it affect your day - a good photographer will make the most of whatever the weather is, and will make the most of you on your wedding day regardless of the weather.
10. Use your groomsmen and bridesmaids - make sure they know the people who will need to be in photographs, give them jobs to make sure that the right people are available to be photographed (including getting people out of the bar!) and give them things to carry for you such as your shoes and flowers.

I'm sure there will be more tips to follow in the next week or two - the more I think about this the more I find that things pop into my head!

10 Tips for Brides - Getting the Most out of your Wedding Photographs

One of the most commonly said things by brides and grooms when it comes to the wedding photography is "I hate having my photograph taken", often followed by "I don't want posed photographs because I look dreadful when I pose".  And yet most people are spending somewhere between £1,500 and £3,500 on their wedding photographs - that's a lot of money to spend if you are then not going to like the finished product!

So here are my tips on how to get the most out of your wedding photographs.

1. Book a photographer you can trust and that you get on with - it is likely that out of all your vendors your photographer is the one who you will be with most of the day so it is important that you like the people who will be with you for so long.
2. Make sure your photographer knows about any types of photographs that you particularly dislike, or any parts of your body that you are self conscious of, such as the tops of your arms, or your nose - for example, I heard recently of a bride's mum who doesn't want the bride's tattoo to show in any of the photographs, and if the photographer knows this beforehand she or he can position the bride so that her tattoo can't be seen in the types of photographs the mum is likely to want.
3. Remember that your photographer can't work miracles, so if you don't like the tops of your arms, get a dress that hides them.  Whilst the sleeveless dresses may look good on some people, they are not necessarily the right dress for everyone.
4. If you are holding flowers when you are being photographed, position then at an angle, or place them at your hips - holding your flowers at boob height will bring your arms and elbows in next to your body and that makes all of us, no matter how slim we are, look twice our size.  So lower your hands to around belly button height, and move your elbows slightly out from your body.
5. Wherever possible remember the photographer's mantra of 'where there's a joint bend it' - so if you stand with your arms straight down at your sides, again this makes you look wider than you are, whereas, if you bend your arms, perhaps placing one hand on your hip, and the other on your thigh, slightly bent, then you will show off your narrow waist.
6. If you are a larger lady, avoid sitting down to be photographed if you can, unless your photographer is taking a photograph of your face from above you - lifting your chin up to the camera will smooth out your neck, and will get rid of any extra chins.  Also, turning your feet and body to be at an angle away from the camera will help you to look slimmer too - most of us look broader when our shoulders are straight on to the camera.
7. Think elegance for the girls, and relaxed for the guys - keep a picture in your minds eye of elegance, and always position yourself as if you have just passed out of finishing school.  So you might want to practice positioning your feet when you are sitting down so that you tuck the ankle of one foot behind the heel of the other, even if your feet are not going to be in the picture.  This takes your legs off at an angle which looks more elegant than having your legs going straight down from your knees to your feet.
8. When you are holding hands with each, avoid finger lacing, or any other hand holding that looks like you are a white knuckle ride!  It looks so much more tender if the groom gently holds the fingertips of his bride.
   
   
9. At some point in the ceremony, and many times afterwards, you will be invited to kiss each other - now whilst the passionate tongue down the throat kiss might feel wonderful it doesn't translate well in photographs, so practice gentle, prolonged kissing, a la the 1940s romantic movies - you'll have fun practicing if nothing else!
10. You don't always have to be looking at the camera for a photograph to look great - look at each other, look off to the side of the camera, perhaps at friends who make you laugh, or lean your foreheads together and close your eyes.
    
11. More Tips for Brides next week - I found myself coming up with much more than 10 tips afterall!